Worst weekend ever.....

Well lets start out the weekend with a visit to the nutrionisit. Find out that you don't eat enough fruit or vegetables (i love fruits and veggies), find out you have a soda problem. Find out you are a true mess.

Pack your suitcase at the last minute. Realize that you are amazing and didn't over pack, didn't underpack either. Leave late for the airport, realize you have no money to tip the shuttle driver, and oh you left your boarding pass at home, along with your itinerary. Make the snap decision at the parking garage to leave the stroller, your first big ass mistake, your daughter is 18lbs and your carseat weighs about 8lbs without baby.
Pull a muscle picking up said daughter from carseat. Pull muscle again while holding baby in longest security line in history. Pull muscles again running from security checkpoint to gate and realize your flight is delayed. Get annoyed at nice ladies admiring your baby that want to touch her. Let them know they need to wash their hands, ladies are not amused but still watch baby. Have man sit next to you and exclaim," Oh no a baby." Get pissed off at him and almost tell him off. Daughter fusses for a few minutes then goes back to sleep. Declare guy an asshole, everyone is surprised that baby is so quiet and tells you how sweet of a baby she is. Make small talk with guy sitting with you and watch crappy movie on tv.
Land in take forever to get car, finally get to mother's house and she isn't there. Spend time with father (pure torture) finally see mother.
Next morning wake up and can't stand up or bend over, pain is unbelieveable. Have to spend time in the car. Aunt makes reference to my daughter finally looking like family, ignore comment because back pain is too bad. Flew all this way to see my cousin, he takes off from the airport without even calling and not even seeing me. I don't see some of my family because they are too busy or have sorry ass excuses.
Leaving almost miss my flight and leave my daughters hat and shoes at the security check point. Calling them now to see if my mother can pick them up.

Has to be the worse weekend ever. Back still hurts a lot and I am so upset it is hard to talk about the weekend anymore.

Babi Phat

Well our little one has hit the 16 week mark. Not doing too bad sleeping throught the night. It isn't constant but it is a lot of fun to wake up and realize hey you've been sleeping the whole time! She is 18 lbs of all woman. She is cute and funny and happy. I couldn't ask for a better baby. I am wondering how she will do with the babysitter today while I am gone for many hours?

I am going to pump some breastmilk and see what happens! Ha

Can wait to get outta here tomorrow gonna go see my mama and grandma. I can't wait to show off our little princess.

Sensitivity

I have been feeling kinda sensitive to certain things lately. It doesn't really seem to make sense. I found out a friend of a friend is getting married. So I guess that means that I am the unwanted friend because I didn't even get invited to come to the bachelorette party. It was really quite sad and really bummed me out. I am getting over it though.

My sister in law, sister, mother in law, and father in law apparently aren't speaking to us. It sucks so much. I hate it when people don't really value me and my time. I am not sure why exactly they don't want to talk to us and I find myself not really caring!

My toddler is driving me nuts, he is always into everything and it makes me wanna lose it completely sometimes.

Weight lost goal still hasn't been reached and probably won't anytime soon.

I love Myspace

I found one of my best friends in the whole world. I haven't seen her in 6 years. She just left. She did my dishes! I totally love her.
Babygirl is trying to give up the nap. Which is totally not working for me. So I gotta get back to putting her to sleep or at least trying too.

Next time:

How to piss off your mother in law so that she doesn't call you anymore!

Open mouth insert...

Ok well I was wrong about the gym. It is working. I am just a blind bat and can't see that even though the weight isn't coming off (I am working on my eating habits). I am currently wearing a size 16 skirt. I couldn't get this skirt over my hips let alone button it anywhere that a waist could have been. I can button it over the muffin top or below it. I am impressed.

I just want to see the waist improve, this muffin top is for the birds! For those of you who don't know a muffin top is the part of your gut that puffs out above the waist band of your pants when you put them on. I have to find a workout to incorporate into the other two days a week that I am not working out.. I need suggestions.

Even my limbs are tired..

Well today lil bit turned 3 months. She has reverted back to her newborn sleeping last night which bit the big one. I am currently running on whatever fumes are left in the tank. I have (since the baby was born) gotten the kids to school on time, whether my husband or mother was here or not, I am very proud of this.
Now facing that my husband is leaving again on a trip kinda makes me wanna scream but I can handle it. I can't get over how tired I am all the time, and how i barely have the energy to face anything during the day. I know that is making me very short with my kids.
After hitting the gym for the past two weeks I have not lost any weight. I think I have discovered a couple of reasons why:

1. I have learned that I totally eat for comfort. If I am frustrated I hit the refrigerator!

2. I eat for pleasure, I love the way food tastes. I am proud that the chinese food leftovers from last week are still in the fridge (yes I am going to throw them away)! Chinese food is my weakness.

3. I eat when I am bored. My husband and I sometimes just go you wanna eat some junk..sure why not.

4. Soda is not my friend,if I give it up I am starving. If I don't I am using good calories on nothing. But the bubbles and sugar are great!

5. I have given up my favorite Starbucks drinks, my cousin introduced me to a White Chocolate Mocha and that was the end of that. I don't drink it anymore. I am missing that caffeine big time.

6.There is Easter candy in the house!

7. I bought buttercreme cake and cupcakes. I had two in one day. This food journaling sucks ass.

8. Yesterday I had a cupcake, an ice cream sandwich, and a slice of cake right at bed time! I have no will power.

9. If I don't over eat, I spend too much money at the mall or my favorite haunt, Target.

10. All 9 of those revelations aren't helping me lose any weight at all.

I have had two cups of yogurt: 60 calories each, 0 grams of fat.
two large pieces of hawaiian sweet bread i baked yesterday: not sure
one Curves strawberry bar: 100 calories 20 from fat
and one 100 calorie pack of short bread cookies: 100 calories 3 from fat
Two bottles of water so = 1 liter of water
So just in 4 hours I have consumed 320 + calories and I am starving! I hate that this is what food has done to me and that I am having a hard time finding a balance. I need to lose 50 lbs but when you are eating a wonderful meal you aren't thinking about any of that.